We are social animals. We are genetically programmed to affiliate, to connect, to build relationships, to love, to share.. And yet, there are some people who are conflicted about this inheritance and seek to fight it. These people are known as commitment phobes.
I wish I could get into the heads of these people. I do not condemn for being who they are. We all are a certain way due to some reason, maybe some experience, some trauma, some social learning. When we avoid something, its because its threatening to us. Like the xenophobic who avoids foreigners like plaque because they are "different" and hence, dangerous. This programming comes from our ancestors who chose to attack anything that was different in order to defend and survive.
So when commitment phobes avoid committing to one person, maybe they are threatened that they will lose their freedom, I suppose. That they will be bound and made to "obey". I know that evolutionary psychologists explain that men are born to sow their seed as widespread as possible. Sounds gross and immoral to me. I hate to believe it. But somehow I do. As a woman, I know how faithfulness and loyalty is important to me. Exactly the same way, multiple partners is important to men, maybe? That means that those men who commit are NOT the norm.
Men are social animals. They are programmed to connect and affiliate with several.
Women are social animals. They are programmed to connect and affiliate with one.
I have met many men and women who differ from the norm. What kind of a man or woman are you?
Thanks men, try and differ from the norm. Thanks women, stay the norm. That way the world will be a happier place.
Just My Thing
15 years ago
2 Words of Wisdom:
I have been reading your blogs lately and quite often... And it really interesting to read your blogs... this particular one seems to be very logical!! and sad too!!
At the end you have a good message for men like us..
I know that evolutionary psychologists explain that men are born to sow their seed as widespread as possible. Sounds gross and immoral to me. I hate to believe it. But somehow I do. As a woman, I know how faithfulness and loyalty is important to me. Exactly the same way, multiple partners is important to men, maybe?
Oye!! What are you talking about yaar? This one is shocking! It really is! Please try not to believe in that!! It's not right. I think loyalty and faithfulness should be the building blocks of any relationship. I think what "some evolutionary psychologist" said is definitely gross and immoral!!
~ Neel.
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