Shoes, handbags, clothes!

Do you have over 20 pairs of shoes, a closet overflowing with clothes, and 4 vip bags full of more clothes that did not fit into the closet? And yet, do you look at your clothes each morning and let out a sigh while saying, "I dont have anything good to wear!"?

A few weeks ago, I realized that I fell into this category of girls described above. The number of clothes in my possession overwhelmed me as I cleaned out my closet in frustration. I came across something I bought in 1995 that looks hideous in 2007. I am proud to say that it still fits. Perhaps, one of the reasons I never threw it away!! Maybe I was waiting for a day that I would outgrow it and hence have a "valid" reason to chuck it instead of merely being bored with it and thus be in the danger of looking like someone with whimsical tastes and a lot of money to spare and spend.

And as I spent the entire day folding and unfolding the huge mountain of clothes, I realized that there are some garments that I bought just for the heck of them being on sale and had never worn them while there were some that I had held on to with the hope that I would one day be "thin" enough to look good in them. Needless to say, that point of satisfaction has still not come and they still remain new with labels on them.

Well, the 4 VIP bags have now been reduced to 2. And the wardrobe that was once overflowing is now quite open to newer clothes. What an irony!! Guilt laden, I think of the number of rupees and dollars spent on these clothes, and how I could perhaps use this money today towards the gas that my car guzzles each week, these days. Thank God for Salvation Army that accepts donations. I at least know that these clothes will be put to good use as opposed to being used as a mop for the kitchen floor.

Now let's start talking about the shoes and the handbags..or maybe not!! I guess, by now, you must have an idea. Are you one of those girls too? Any Carrie Bradshaws reading this article and wanting to rave about the number of Manolo Blahniks they have!!?

Thank you, and keep donating.

Don't like the US of A?

If you are one of those desis who is complaining about life in the United States and yearns to go back to India, my question to you is...

"Why dont you go back?"

If you want to say that there is more money here, and that you can live a better life (read luxurious and easy) here, then my question to you is...

"What is it that you want? The feeling you had when you were at "home" or the luxuries?"

If you think that you dont want to raise your kids here because the culture in the United States is really bad, my question to you is...

"Why were your kids born here?"

If you say that you wanted your kids to be American citizens, my question to you is...

"Why? If the US is so terrible for you, why make them citizens of a terrible country? You are an Indian citizen, why can't they be Indian citizens too?"

If you say that you want your kids to be able to come back later for a good education, my question to you is...

"So you do recognize that there is something good about the education system here and that it does not need to reshuffle?"


Why complain if you made the decision to come here? Was it a bad decision? If yes, then rectify it and go back. You need to pay off student loans? Wont be so bad..work full time for three years, dont get married, dont incur any more debts, and lo! your problems will be solved. Then go back! Attracted towards the greencard? Want to stay more so that you can have one and leave? Why? Since the US is not doing you any good anyway. Oh..maybe the greencard is not enough so you need to work towards a citizenship and then leave.....just in case you want to come back, you can? Why? You don't like the US of A right? Oh...you like it but like India better? Well, what is it that you want? Don't know? Think about it. And if you finally make a decision to stay here and not go back to your motherland, stop complaining and stick to your decision.

Thanks, and live life to the fullest.

Addendum: A clarification I would like to make. Miss India by all means. It was/is home after all. Complain about the cons here. After all, nothing is perfect. My pet peeve is people who DETEST the USA and criticize it to shreds and yet conjure up excuses to not go back.

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly!

This blog is dedicated to the bad and ugly people in my life. I want to say thank you to you for being who you are.

After all, I am a social animal and I would like to see myself in a societal context. I accept that I am part of a society that has people like you in it. Rude, obnoxious, egoistic, conflictual, cruel, and antagonistic. And I am grateful that you exist. Why..someone might ask? Would we not be better off without these people who create chaos and destroy peace of mind? No, I would say. Without these people, we would never know what the good is. And if we did, we would not value it as much. Without these people, we would take our peace of mind for granted. But when these people create negative emotions within us, we learn to appreciate the people who make us feel good about ourselves. If it were not for the bad and the ugly, we would not know the true definition of good.

Let's learn to appreciate all that we have. Let's not curse these people in our lives who sometimes make it a living hell. Let's thank them for making us realize what heaven is.

Thank you and be good.

Disclaimer: Ugly refers to a lack of beauty in character, not appearance.

Farewell!

This blog is not philosophical, nor controversial. Its merely a memorial to something precious I lost today.

You came into my hands sometime in 2005. Little did I know that you would become such a precious part of me; so precious that I would let go of you only at night when I went to bed. I have taken you with me everywhere I went..to school, to the gym, to my clinic, sometimes even to the restroom! People have enquired about you when they did not see me with you.

You have survived many accidents. You once fell in water and my friend, Sulabh helped you out. You once got locked in my closet and I found you after days of agony..but you survived and returned to me. You once hurt your mouth and I had to hold on to it for days but my mate, Arun resolved the problem, much to my relief.

I thought you were a survivor and though I love you to death, I have often taken you for granted. Today, due to my recklessness, I have lost you. Please forgive me. I know that I will be punished for this. I already am being punished by the pangs of misery that I feel everytime I think about you. I wonder where you are. I wonder if you are safe. And I wonder if you will return to me.

My friends have said that I can replace you. Little do they know that you can never replace the one you love. I might find something else to replace you. But your memories will be in my heart forever.

Farewell, my bluetooth headset! Life will never be the same without you!

Two to tango and four to fight!?

A and B are great friends!
A to B: "I dont think you should have done that."
B to A: "I am sorry. Yeah I dont think I should have."
A to B: "Well, I am pretty mad about it anyway. Please dont talk to me for some time until I cool down."
B is upset.

C and D are great friends as well!
C to D: "I dont think this is how she should have reacted. I wonder how B tolerated it."
D to C: "Ya he should have given it back to her or said something to her. What a bitch!"

C,D to B: "Hey dude. We did not like what A did to you. You should have given it back to her. I think you should talk to her."

Were C and D backbiting? Were they concerned for B? Were they interfering? Were they advising? What is the fine line between being concerned and discussing an issue and gossiping or backbiting? When should one back off when the two people concerned are having a problem with one another? If they are able to resolve the issue on their own but not the way you want it to, should you show them the "right" way (read your way)? When they are unable to resolve the issue, should you go add fuel to the fire? Or maybe salt to their wounds?

"Its great that you are not talking to each other. She was stupid anyway."
" I wonder how you deal with someone like her."

How many relationships that I know could have been salvaged if people like C and D did not project onto A and B? And people like B did not take C and D's words at face value. I myself have been guilty of being in B's position as well as C and D's position but have learned it the hard way that not all C's and D's mean well. And that when being in B's position, I ought to think of what A means to me rather than trying to please C and D.

Wish there was a law against unsolicited advice and unwanted suggestions. But then, if there were such a law, I would not be writing this blog either!

Moral of the story: Live and let live!

Thanks and let's not intervene when not needed!