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Sunday, July 1, 2007

Two to tango and four to fight!?

A and B are great friends!
A to B: "I dont think you should have done that."
B to A: "I am sorry. Yeah I dont think I should have."
A to B: "Well, I am pretty mad about it anyway. Please dont talk to me for some time until I cool down."
B is upset.

C and D are great friends as well!
C to D: "I dont think this is how she should have reacted. I wonder how B tolerated it."
D to C: "Ya he should have given it back to her or said something to her. What a bitch!"

C,D to B: "Hey dude. We did not like what A did to you. You should have given it back to her. I think you should talk to her."

Were C and D backbiting? Were they concerned for B? Were they interfering? Were they advising? What is the fine line between being concerned and discussing an issue and gossiping or backbiting? When should one back off when the two people concerned are having a problem with one another? If they are able to resolve the issue on their own but not the way you want it to, should you show them the "right" way (read your way)? When they are unable to resolve the issue, should you go add fuel to the fire? Or maybe salt to their wounds?

"Its great that you are not talking to each other. She was stupid anyway."
" I wonder how you deal with someone like her."

How many relationships that I know could have been salvaged if people like C and D did not project onto A and B? And people like B did not take C and D's words at face value. I myself have been guilty of being in B's position as well as C and D's position but have learned it the hard way that not all C's and D's mean well. And that when being in B's position, I ought to think of what A means to me rather than trying to please C and D.

Wish there was a law against unsolicited advice and unwanted suggestions. But then, if there were such a law, I would not be writing this blog either!

Moral of the story: Live and let live!

Thanks and let's not intervene when not needed!

1 Words of Wisdom:

Archangel Lucifer.... said...

Relationships so fickle that 'A' and 'B' were affected by a group talkin things about them are not ment to last.

takin a cue from the incidence kindly revaluate the bond between A and B.

the easy shaky opinion of A and B shows the relationship to be flawed with doubt, insecurity, immaturity and self content.

No ..if A and B dont sail through this relationship smoothly..
I wont Be surprised..

if that trust aint reached soon then its better for both A and B to keep their options open cos their relationship presently has many flaws..

i dunno who A, B, C, D are..

if any one is hurt due to my comments..so be it...

its pure "rationalism"..

as preached by the owner of this blog..