Yesterday, my client walked in and reported he was suicidal. Told me that he would give me no guarantee that he would not act on it. I had to do my intervention. The right one. There would be no second chances or trials here. After 45 minutes, though not very convinced, I was convinced enough that he would not do anything to himself. At least not that day. He promised to return the next morning to see me.
Today, my client did not show for his appointment, did not return my calls nor my emails. Not in the morning, not in the afternoon. And I panicked. Rightly so. I was not sure if my client was dead or alive.
And at that time, some things just did not matter.
It did not matter that I have put on weight.
It did not matter that I need a haircut.
It did not matter that my back hurts chronically.
It did not matter that my bank account is dwindling.
It did not matter that I dont have a new dress to wear on my birthday.
It did not matter that it took me an hour to drive to work today.
It did not matter my friend is hen-pecked.
It did not matter that my friends ganged up on me.
It did not matter that my friend broke my trust.
It did not matter that I got a B in an easy class.
It did not matter that I live in a boring city.
It did not matter that I dont like my car.
It did not matter that gas prices are so high.
It did not matter that I am going to miss my best friend's wedding.
It did not matter that it was so cold today.
It did not matter..did not matter at all.
All that mattered was my client's life, his safety, his well-being. All that mattered was human life.
My client called late that day. Reported he was alright, that he had only been so tired that he had slept through the day. That mattered. That phone call mattered.
Just My Thing
15 years ago
10 Words of Wisdom:
im just abt discovering your blogs ..what youve said is absolutely true
You are so right. The sad part is that it takes a storm for us to realize the importance of life. Once the clouds clear, the importance is forgotten ..
here lies our common ground.. the template! our priorities like everything else changes. 'Cosmic joy' has nailed it.
A'yte this one's definitely not controversial :P wow, you said a lot of things about you in what didn't matter to you section :p hehe but yes, indeed that would be freaky. This is just the beginning though. You would need to prepare yourself for lot more of similar cases in your career. Isn't it? It is depressing but then at the end of the day when you realize that you've made a positive difference to someone's life; I bet it's very satisfying.
On a lighter note, I wonder all those things that didn't matter to you then, matters to you now?? Especially the bank-account one! :P hehe
~ Neel
Ins't it surprising that we worry about the smallest stuff but then there are moments that everything is forgotten with out any effort?! when you know your exam result will be out in 1 hr .. you don;t remember anything from your To-Do list during that hr. When you are waiting for someone you haven't met in years .. you don't remember that its your credit card payment due date... some of these things have a weird way of easing you out of the immediate world u r in into an emotion that is felt unadulterated by any other emotion.
hmmmmmmm that shows ur dedication in ur work. Also shook ur confidence abt ur interpretation of the clients mental state and may be a little bit of fear that u underplayed urself in convincing him of not taking the right decision.
and above all the humanity that lies inside u and rightly so that u panicked. Because there was no next time and nothing else mattered before life or rather Death may be of your client whom u might never meet again .
I got goose bumps as i read this, so true.... certain things are so small and we spend whole of our lives, cribbing about them and miss out on the better things,
loved this one!
by the way, what do u do?
I am training to be a psychologist!
Ooooo thats cool, interesting, right?
All the best! spread smiles, u have got the opportunity to do that!
BTW..This is my fav post of ur blogs....I have read it many times over
n makes me REALLY WANT to be what i hope to be in life...someday....in terms of a career...
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